Personal Sanity

I have written a few short stories and several blogs in the short time that I have had my website up and running so themes are forming and patterns are beginning to emerge.  Some of those patterns are exciting as the website generates traffic and grows its content while my vision of what I wanted to accomplish takes hold in reality.  Some of those patterns are interesting as people who know me ask questions about who I am and where do these ideas of mine come from.

Yes I realize that my stories share a common dark theme.  Loneliness, or stalking or death from cheerleaders to tomatoes.  What the hell did the tomato ever do to you?  If you haven’t read any of my short stories take a look on my main blog site.  There is a link to the right under “Journalstone Blog”.  My favorite one is “Inevitable Death” which is a snapshot of family life from a unique perspective.  I find it baffling how everyone who reads my writing asks the same question no matter how well they know me.  “Are these stories real?”

Just for the record I have not killed anyone.  I can’t state that more emphatically.  I haven’t and I will not.  Interestingly enough I am a non-violent person who for whatever reason seems to have the ability to write about violent situations in a very realistic way.  Granted I do take situations from life that I have experienced and or that I know have occurred and inject them into my themes at times but they are loosely based experiences that form unique stories that are completely and totally fictional.  Can I say the word fiction anymore?

So for all of those worried friends out there rest soundly.  I won’t be sitting outside your windows or stalking you any time soon.  I won’t harass anyone or attack anyone in a foreign country or in an apartment building in the bay area.  I won’t be attending the funerals of my close friends as they disappear one by one slowly finding their way into strange and odd circumstances that forever change their lives.

Or will I?

E-Mail and Divorce

I had the pleasure of going to court today and it amazes me how people when cornered with the truth gain such a comfort with lying. My soon to be ex-wife seems to have the ability to avoid the truth with almost the same passion she avoided se…………x

OK, let’s not get overboard. There are always two sides to every story but I guess you will have to live with just one. Hahahahaha, mine. So we finished up (court that is, trust me I am close to getting sick with your insulation) and she insisted on sending me e-mails. Her bone of contention is my vulgarity in our correspondence. I admit that I can get carried away at times but it is the same scenario as fouling a player on the opposite team. The person who does the first hit never gets the foul it is always the guy who retaliates.

She doesn’t get the fact that if she would simply stop lying, be up front, figure out a way to be a decent person I would have no issues and no reason to ever be angry. Examples are as numerous as raindrops in a downpour. Latest would simply be not sending me my life insurance premium notice allowing my policy to lapse or lying and not paying the property taxes on our house which she lives in yet never telling me or simply refusing to pay me for the 3k plus worth of kid expenses that she insisted on splitting fifty fifty in court. What the hell am I supposed to do? Thank her for being driving me insane.

You decide. Example e-mail sent today. This is word for word no editing involved except for changing out the names.

Ex-wife or as I like to say (Unreasonable and Lost) “To keep updated on split expenses I paid 41 for (child 2) to go to honor roll field trip (you owe 20.50) I paid (child 3) 9 for field trip (you owe 4.50)”

My response or as I like to think of myself (handsome hunky sane guy). I personally believe that my response is fine, sane and reasonable but well it is my response so I would think that I guess. “Excellent I will deduct it from what you owe me. Thanks”

Ex-wife or as I like to say (Unreasonable and Lost) “Again the court order is for no abusive emails just facts This is written in passive aggressive voice A mere “ok” is fine from now on to acknowledge receipt And we will start accounting for costs now separately from the past to keep it clean. Thank you.”

OK, is it just me or is that crazy. Please, I am serious I need help in understanding if I am losing my mind or if that is the craziest thing you have ever heard of. Anyone please let me know.

Desperately seeking sanity.

Calling my Boss Mr. Pinky for the day

Sorry, I am running behind in my blogging duties.  What can I say other than “Mr. Pinky”, “Mr. Pinky”.

“Here Mr. Pinky”.  Ok, don’t freak out. 

If anyone actually reads my website you will know that I have pledged to do a selection of stupid stuff and one of my first tasks was calling my boss Mr. Pinky for the day.   I think he looks so cute in his little hat.  OK, don’t get the wrong idea.  Our relationship is not freaky or anything.  He is just the guy who pats me on the back when I do a good job and smiles at me down the hallway when he sees me.  Jesus, this sounds freaky.

OK, he has to be a decent guy not to fire me for writing this kind of stuff right.  Just imagine sitting in a conference room with a room full of people and calling your boss Mr. Pinky.  I think everyone below had a nice time and he does have a good fan club.

I personally would not want a group of woman sitting around a huge table holding up signs calling me Mr. Pinky but so far he has been cool with it.  I think next time we should go a different route and maybe have the theme be Mr. Big.  Hmmm, that sounds like it might be taken already.  OMG, I have the sequel to the next Sex in the City movie.  Mr. Big meets Mr. Pinky (log where your mind goes now, then come back).  I could get my boss a job in Hollywood; he would make millions and therefore couldn’t be upset by the slight blog that was focused on something so ridiculous.

 

Well wish me luck.  Hopefully he will laugh and not take things to seriously.  If he does I could just show all these pictures to his wife.  She thinks he works in accounting.  These ladies don’t look like any accountants I have ever known.

DM’s Stupid Stuff.  (log back in periodically to check out the continuous antics of DM)